Fix for TES V: Skyrim “Special Edition” not launching

Regarding my absolute meltdown last night due to “Fallout 4” being an absolute crashy mess in V.A.T.S. and the special edition of “The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim” for whatever reason not launching, I seem to have found a fix. It’s the most stupid fix I have encountered yet.

See, whenever there are files missing or certain parts of a program are outdated, we tend to have certain… hrmmm… watchamacallits… oh yeah! ERROR MESSAGES in place! You know, those traumatizing yet helpful messages that tell you what is wrong and thus may give some pointers as to how you may proceed to fix the problem? I’m not including those worthless “oh lol something went wrong for whatever reason you know we’re not going to tell you because our programmers are too fuckign lazy to doa nything right so where just going to ignore you bye”-messages here. Fuck those.

Anyway, I was browsing the Steams and decided to search for “won’t launch”, which didn’t bring up any results. Oh… right, people don’t know what “launch” means. So I tried “won’t start”, and I ended up finding this thread. Specifically, the final comment, which mentioned this video, contained the fix I was looking for.

“So then,” I hear you say. “What was it, then, that was your problem, you spastic turd?” I won’t sugarcoat it for you nor anybody else. My problem was that Windows, specifically the seventh version, for whatever reason was missing this update.

As for why it was missing, I have no idea. I have updates turned on — even non-essential ones, I’m fairly sure. How I have not gotten this update over the course of two fucking months is incomprehensible to me. I’m pretty sure my system updates at least once a month, so don’t come here and tell me I was missing some update because it decided to skip it. Fuck that. That is absolutely retarded, and Micro$oft should be ashamed of themselves.

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