The Flock – An “asymmetrical multiplayer game”

For quite some time, I have been publishing blog posts that have had nothing to do with gaming. This blog post, on the other hand, is actually about something within gaming. It’s about the game “The Flock”, which, as the developers call it, is an “asymmetrical multiplayer game”. Whatever that means, I don’t know. I just know that the prospect of the game is incredibly retarded.

Laziness

Imagine this: you buy a game for $16.99, and you come to find that, one day, YOU CAN’T FUCKING PLAY IT ANYMORE! That’s what this game by Vogelsap is going to become: an unplayable game. According to the game’s website, the game will cease being purchasable after the arbitrary death toll limit has been reached. Upon reaching the limit, the game will enter some sort of “final stage” with an ending only accessible to those who have already bought the game. The price is $16.99 of course; it’s not like a game with a limited lifespan would cost a dollar or two, is it?

“So, what is your beef with this game, RudeGuyGames?” I hear you ask. Well, it’s the fact that, to me, it has a completely arbitrarily set “time limit” after which the game is rendered inaccessible. Add to that the fact that it costs no less than $16.99, and you’ve got yourself a piece of shit that is essentially a way for the developers to opt out of the long-term support of the game by artificially restricting the time the game will be available. Old games of age have until now become unplayable not because of the developers having set a time limit, but because the technology the games use to run has become naturally obsolete as new technology has been developed and become mainstream, giving birth to emulators et cetera. The plan set up for this newfound “asymmetrical multiplayer game” paves the way for speeding up this process by making the game unplayable after a certain amount of time has passed, albeit it’s up to the players to decide when that time will come. To me, it doesn’t matter; I won’t buy the game, and the “climactic finale” will probably suck, anyway.

Calculations

For now, the game seems to be in good standing. At the time of writing, about 215,340,050 of “The Flock’s” population remains. If we assume the population is to decrease by about one death per second on average, it will take around 6.82371441 years , or 6 years and just under 301 days. This is the time it would take from August 22nd, 2015 at around 07:25:35 PM (GMT +1) until the End Times, to be exact.

Of course, the estimate above is a very optimistic one at the least; as the game’s sales figure increases, a greater amount of the population of “The Flock” will die off as a concurrent result of aforementioned sales figure increase, so obviously the death toll per second would become higher. As of now, though, the death toll has only increased by 200 after 19 minutes and 30 seconds, giving us an average of one death every 5.85 seconds (xlsx/pdf). You can do the math for that one yourself.

I’m not alone

Other people have also stated their concerns for the game and its premise. While the concept may sound “cool” and “totally rad”, its limited population mixed with its no-births-only-deaths policy kills it.

All comments are from an article on PCGamer.

Nice try

It’s a nice concept, but the fact that the game is rendered unplayable after the population reaches 0 is what keeps me from being interested in this game. This is an experimental game, and it shows: It looks boring as hell, and the animations are shit. I think I’ll save my money for SOMA or some other game that’s actually worth it.

So should everybody else.

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FUCK LATIN!

Well, kinda. You all know I study Latin on my free time. While that makes it sound like I’m some sort of Latin fanatic, I really am not. What it means is that I have a higher-than-average interest in the language for linguistical reasons. Really, the entire reason I started teaching myself Latin is to grasp how a language functions better, and I realized learning Latin might be the way to go. Continue reading

My computer is about to crash!

Yeah… no… it’s just another scam call. Aren’t they fun? Aren’t they just the most wonderful thing in the world? This is why I never pick up the phone! I guess you could screw around with them if you wanted to, but they’re really just a waste of time in the end. Just tell them you’ll be getting a new computer VERY SOON. They’ll hang up if you’re as lucky as me.

How the fuck would you know that my computer is about to crash, anyway? Do you have access to my computer’s files? And I have several computers! If you can see my files through your magical screen, why do I have to download anything? Can’t you just flick your wand to clean it or something? I don’t know what this one caller wanted, but she just hung up once I told her I’d be getting a new computer soon. I pity those that have to do this type of work, calling people with such poor English. Are there no better jobs? I guess somebody has to fill the “world’s scammer quota”. I would have been tempted to continue the conversation if I hadn’t just woken up and wasn’t about to eat breakfast, for fuck’s sake.

Lastly, if you call me because of some urgent incoming crash, why do you speak English? I live in Norway; it is customary to speak Norwegian when you call a number in Norway unless it is addressed to some international corporation or whatever.

I’m not really getting a new computer soon. Maybe. I don’t know if I want to or not.

MY HOMEPAGE! NOOOOO!!!!!!1111

FUCK! What happened to my homepage? Lately it’s been nothing but a few videos floating in an ocean of shitty DangerDolan, listXX/topXXs* and whatever other cashgrabs. I have had my share of these videos, but they still show up. Fuck ’em.

YouTube - Google Chrome_2015-08-17_21-19-59_fuckyou

On the other hand, there have been no recommendations of PewDiePie, UberHaxorNova, TobyGames, Markiplier or any of the other one thousand intolerable, despicable and outright vile rip-offs that thought ripping of the aforementioned four was a good idea.

* replace “XX” with arbitrary number

UPDATE 18th August, 2015 at 11:53 PM (GMT+1)

I have an idea as to why this might be happening: Perhaps YouTube understands how innately attictive these videos tend to be. Look at Alltime10s, for example. I remember often sitting around watching their videos and not doing anything else even though I knew I should be getting of my ass or playing a video game or do something other than just watch these stupid videos the whole night.

DMCA – Dumbest Motherfucking Cocksuckers of All

I am going to break one of my own conditions and ask “what the fuck is going on?” When in the name of Holy Shit and Cursed Farts will this copyright claim combo stop? These fucking claims saying “I own this word and I will remove everybody else using this word from existence” are getting increasingly ancient, and people who do it deserve to be castrated and consequently eradicated by choking on their own mutilated genitalia. (Apparently, that’s illegal for me to say somewhere in the world…)

Examples of this idiocy includes Bethesda spraining their vaginal walls because of Mojang’s “Scrolls”, a claim which thankfully was rejected, the absolutely retarded company King clutching their balls in agony after people rioted against them when they tried to trademark “Candy” (use AdBlock before clicking the link) and now the fucking mess going on at Vimeo, where producer little bitch Adam Sandler & co. were removing a bunch of videos from the site (Video below). The dumb fucks even managed to remove their own trailer. Nice. Regardless, it seems Vimeo is doing something about it, though, which can’t really be said about YouTube these days. Anyway, videos that came out before the movie was even a thing had been removed. I think that, if anything, “Pixels” the actual movie by shitty Columbia or whatever is what should be removed.

It’s also worth noting people are actually buying into this “pixels” gimmick. Even though it has gotten near-absolute shit reviews ON EVERY FUCKING SITE THAT EXISTS, except for Cinemablend, apparently, people still go watch it in the cinemas.

On to the YouTube video regarding the Vimeo carnage that was going on. It’s by ReviewTechUSA, so if you still believe he owed BigCheese 200 bananas, don’t watch it.