Boring Fortress

This “game” used to be fun to mess around in, but after the update last year, it’s started sucking dick. Why? Because it’s turned into a fuckfest with nothing to do. I’m one of those people who were interested in the adventure mode updates. I don’t really give a flying fuck about fortress mode, because it sucks dick and is boring as hell. I like wandering around, completing quests, exploring areas, that kind of stuff. Unfortunately, adventure mode has, as states previously, started sucking dick.

I haven’t really played DF since its release because I have been waiting for bug fixes. I think the last thing I need when playing a ostensibly shitty “game” is even more shit thrown at my face in the form of bugs, crashes and freezes. I didn’t want DF’s adventure mode to suck, but it does.

I should probably write why I think adventure mode has gone to shit. First of all, there’s nothing to do. By nothing to do, I mean there are no quests to do. Just about every quest I am given requires me to go to some unreachable zone overseas or across the fucking continent to kill some hydra or titan or whatever. What happened to the old days where there were outlaws? Actually, there are “outlaws”, but they puzzle me, because they don’t really seem to give a shit when I approach their camps. It makes me feel uneasy about killing them. Not to mention there’s a fuckload of them, which makes the entire ordeal an impossibility.

My second pet peeve ties in with my first point. It’s about dark fortresses and dark pits. This is what had me write this post, because it pisses me off when there’s a seemingly sprawling community of enemies when there’s really not. Instead, I got a fucking human army thrown at my face. I died to humans, not goblins. I wouldn’t have met this fate had there been something to do at the first dark pit I visited. My problem with these sites is that ALL THE FUCKING GOBLINS ARE AT THE ROOFTOPS, WHICH ARE INACCESSIBLE. How the fuck did they even get up there? How am I supposed to get up there? Why are they up there? WHAT IS THE FUCKING POINT IN HAVING THESE SITES WHEN THERE’S NOTHING TO DO IN THEM? And why was I killed by a human army, anyway? Did they mistake me for goblins? Were they allied with the goblins? Did I invade their territory? Is that why the goblins where hiding on the seemingly inaccessible rooftops? Why did they attack me without rhyme or reason like that when plenty of armies didn’t give a shit about me? Are they retarded? Is this “game” retarded? I ToadyOne retarded? Im confus. And angri.

Finally, I’d like to say this “game” runs like shit. I realize it’s is really complex and takes a lot of effort to update as it is, but wasn’t Dwarf Fortress practically re-written for the 2014 update? There was no option of throwing multithreading in there? Dwarf Fortress is getting to the point where running it on one core only is starting to be questionable at best.


3 comments on “Boring Fortress

  1. rudeguygames says:

    Addendum I: Just got stuck in an empty lair. Good thing I just saved outside the lair so I could terminate the game. I refuse to lose to such retardation.

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