When I first started doing Let’s Plays on YouTube, I was slightly different from what I am now. I have received numerous questions asking if I am suffering from autism, and I can’t blame them. However, I can blame them for making the questions hateful. For those of you not in the know, yes, I most likely have autism. Specifically, I was diagnosed for having Asperger’s syndrome a couple of years back.
During 2013, I have tried to withhold my uncontrollable, seemingly “angry” and “querulous” automatic “attitude”. In my Let’s Play of Skyrim, I was calm at first, but the attitude started escalating as it went on. In Let’s Play Thang Global, I can’t remember much, because I haven’t watched it in a while. Fuck the Dekaron Let’s Play. I couldn’t give less of a fuck about it, even if I had to. The same goes for my RuneScape Let’s Play. It was after I stopped doing retarded, grindy games like those I finally realized I had to stop the “insanity”. Vindictus gave me a good going over, but I stopped, for reasons I don’t even know. I guess I couldn’t be arsed because the game was boring. It was not until Let’s Play KSP I turned really “srs face >:|”. I tried to overcome my monotone voice. Seriously, fuck my voice. I keep thinking to myself “Oh, it’s fine. Nobody cares about your voice.” Actually, my impression of people who comment is that they are digusted by it. If I focus on my voice when I review my Let’s Play before uploading (and after, for that matter), I hear disinterest. Disgust. Hate. Anger. Frustration. Lack of humor. False expressions.
I watch other Let’s Players from time to time, even daily so, sometimes. I don’t watch PewDiePie, because he strikes me as a polar opposite of mine. I watch more serious, calm, and laid-back Let’s Players, such as Jefmajor, NintendoCapriSun, and Nazereth1. I take a few inspirations from these, though I still can’t help thinking I can’t do my Let’s Plays the way they’re doing it. It admit that’s the point, but I am stuck with nothing but 200-something subscribers and next-to-no comments. I get a like here and there, but it’s not cutting it. I want feedback, not some half-assed mongoloids who have nothing better to do than harass someone for no specific reason.
So, enough rambling. I am considering deleting my old Let’s Plays. I’m not talking about Skyrim, Thang Global and Dekaron or anything, but the whole bunch up until Kerbal Space Program. They only serve to provide useless hate from retards who can’t look at the date, and, quite frankly, it’s bothering the piss out of me. There won’t be a poll. If I find it necessary to remove the Let’s Plays, I will. If not, I won’t. I honestly think the former will be the most likely choice out of the two.